Why Is Everyone Obsessed With Drake’s Sweater In ‘Hotline Bling’?

Do we really need to have this conversation?! Okay, no need to pull my hand here. We’ll talk Drake. God knows everyone else is, with the www blowing up these days over whatever the hell this fucking gorgeous man is doing. Yesterday he dropped the video for ‘Hotline Bling’ and the world picked at it inch by inch, from his way way way way too funny dance moves (how can you not love him seriously?!), to the music (he talented ok!), to his sartorial choices.

But who gives a shit about his ‘dancing-like-a-drunk-dad-at-a-wedding’-moves – oh, oh, oh, oh, I’m sorry the Cha-cha-cha, my bad, my bad – when the song is so good and he looks beyond hot in his boots, and knits, and hoodies. Casual, cool, cozy – it’s like the man is a walking good-time-invitation. Netflix, chill, white wine. Fucking forget Netflix at this point.

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But the ‘WHY’ lingers on.

Why are we all talking about his mock-turtleneck sweater? Or are we just fooling ourselves we’re talking Drake’s sweater in ‘Hotline Bling’, instead of Drake alone? Both. YES, we might as well come clean on this one. Drake is very appealing to the eyes, and we’re always on and on about him. How could we not? He’s got a song for every situation. Lyrics for every mood. And that smile. And he a real man too.

“Drake would never treat me like this.” is the ubiquitous meme that’s become the death of basically every male human being on the face of this earth who’s not treating his lady right.

You add this on top of his brilliant talented ass, of course the man will break the internet with or without a fucking sweater. Still… he in a sweater and he killing it. The cozy man sweater – turtleneck or mock-turtleneck to be more precise – will 100% be the trendiest and most coveted piece of clothing in menswear history. Mark my words.

When last fall it was a parade of turtlenecks courtesy of the 70s fashion happening, I got a little carried away and named the trend unisex – went further on actually, as I so often do (usually resulting into a complete embarrassment and total fool of myself) and made a post about how men should wear turtlenecks. Of course nobody gave the slightest fuck about it, and all the men in my life laughed in my face when I showed up with this trend on the table.

Well… who’s laughing now motherfuckers? All running to the stores like headless chickens to get the Drake’s Acne Studios sweater?

I live up to my reputation of walking-embarssament and exaggeration though, so again I am stating – the quite obvious now – TURTLENECKS are the new IT sweaters in menswear for 2015 autumn. If I stood no chance last season with this trend-calling, Drake came to my aid, pulled one turtleneck over his head-and-body and he’s got you round his little finger. I don’t blame you, the man could sell sand in plain desert.

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How do male human beings wear men turtlenecks? Listen to a lot Drake, perhaps his manliness and sexiness and good ol’ wholeness will rub off on you. Learn the cha-cha a la Drake. Get some of those sweatpants we can see your religion through. What?!

Get the badass boots. Practice that smile. And talk to us in Drake language please. Otherwise, move along.

The Drake ‘Hotline Bling’ look below.

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The sweater obsession is real though, but it’s not really about the sweater is it? It’s about all the above, and all Drake stands for really, as pretentious as that sounds. Yes, women love Drake. So what? In this very pop-culture-crush lies the whole obsession explanation: we want the real thing, sensitive real man, who can hold us in their cozy sweaters, kiss and cuddle, fuck with no restraints, love with no boundaries, cry when they fucked up, throw a fist when necessary, stand up to and by us, support us, don’t get chicken shit scared, admit when they do, be a good man to us and a bad boy to the rest. You know… Levelling up to THAT ain’t such a walk in the park, but I guess nicking a sweater from a style icon who stands for all the above will perpetuate the illusion of being somewhat similar. One can only hope, right guys?

 Regarding the sweater in Hotline Bling, stop fussing will ya’?! I got your back with a bunch of Drake sweaters below.

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And now if you’ll excuse me I’ll go fall in love some more, with a man who will never disappoint me from any point of view, cause he’s a fantasy. But that’s not the point. Ugh.

 

 

 

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